Christmas time comes, this post talks about how I wanted either us to move or him to move out. Neither happened, I got a voice recorder instead.
May 23rd, another blow up, he said that a month from that day, he will be moved out & to put the date down in my phone. June 23rd came & gone, he was still here! In July, he was too sick to work most of the month because of his kidney stone. Nothing could be done about it at the time because he also decided to fuck up his Tri-care. He gets kidney stones every year, he knew it was coming, so why did he mess up his insurance???
About 2 weeks ago, another blow up. Mom & I told him he has to leave (yes, we still live with her!), he said his new place would be ready last Wednesday, it wasn't (typical), but he's been staying with someone & moving out what he could. I took away his apartment key, but he magically still has a copy. This coming from the same idiot who frequently lost my keys & his keys at the same time, but couldn't be bothered to look for them!
Numerous times in the last 4 years, he has said he would do things that he never did. He keeps sending me messages about how much he loves me & how he doesn't want to be apart from me. TOO LITTLE, TOO LATE!!! I told him he's trespassing if he uses a key to get into the apartment, he did at least once when I went out of town w/my mom & "step-dad" (they're not married, but they might as well be, they act like a REAL married couple, unlike Vx & I). The laptop he "had to have for his deployment" that he never went on is also gone, 3/4 of the storage containers in the bedroom where he kept some of his Army crap in are gone, he had the newspapers laying on the couch, with a picture f/our wedding & the cake topper on the kitchen counter. His desktop computer is still here on his huge-ass desk, some of the stuff that was on it is still there, I have piled on stuff I have found in other areas there for him to get. Some stuff will be easy to split up, others not so much. My mom keeps insisting on me getting the fancy cookware out of storage that my brother gave us that we never used (we have mom's stuff, it's crowded as it is, why have more than what we need here?), I don't have a key, so I'll have to try & get it from him. We bought a set of tables, the coffee table is what I use as a computer desk for my laptop, the other 2 side tables are still in pieces in the storage unit. Towels & some bakeware my friend in AZ sent us are also in there. His younger sister bought us a few dishes (storage), some friends of his bought some kitchen cookware utensils, his former Sifu bought us a set of towels & some bathroom stuff (towels in storage, other stuff in bathroom), someone bought a comforter & throw blanket for the bed, one was from the older sister, the other may have been from my former boss, idk (no gift book was purchased, & my memory was still fuzzy partly f/dealing w/morphine withdrawals). The other wedding gifts we received were cash or they were waiting to give them until we moved (almost 4 years later, we still haven't moved or received those gifts).
I'm keeping the cat, no questions asked. He didn't clean her litter box for over a year because he wouldn't tell me that I was buying litter that aggravated his asthma that according to the Army he doesn't have, he didn't refill her food or water dish when asked to, so why would he take good care of her on his own now? He never took her to the vet, either. He never had the joy of being in the car w/her (constant, loud crying, especially while driving in a construction zone).
He has not paid any rent in the last 4 years or so, he hasn't paid his cell phone bill, either. He thought I was taking care of that, there never was enough money in the bank to cover the cell phone bills, rent, car insurance, internet he had to have (I went to the library & used my phone before that), & everything else. Then he wondered why I got so mad at him for buying useless crap.
He said he would fix my air conditioner, it hasn't worked right for over a year, he never did. Some of the last hockey games we drove home from in my car, it was raining. When the wipers were turned on, we saw they needed to be replaced. He said he would do it. I want to say 2 months later, it rains again while I'm out driving. The wipers were never replaced, so I had the guy at Auto Zone do it for me. We had numerous days over 100 degrees outside, one of those days, Vx drove my car to do stuff when I needed to do things with it instead. He said he was working, so I kept asking him, "Why didn't you drive you work van?" when he finally returned home, I left just to find out my car was about to overheat! I took my car keys away from him. Earlier that day, I had also asked him to refill P's food dish, either she ate a whole lot more food in those few hours then she normally does in a day or he didn't do it. That day, it was just one thing after another.
Numerous times, he has said he was sorry & he wouldn't do it again, just to turn around & do it again, or he would say he would do something, and then not do it. I've had it!
I may not be married into the Army much longer, but then again, I have no job, he won't get a "real" job, so we may have to end up staying married, just living separately, idk. If your asking "why doesn't he go full time?" he said he tried that, there are too many active duty soldiers, while the Reserves are short-handed in certain areas (just not in his area, considering units in our area have more CBRN's then they know what to do with them). He also said he's not qualified to join the HAZMAT team the fire department has. SERIOUSLY?!?! I don't doubt Vx on this, it just seems real fucked-up his Army skills can't be used for anything in the real world. The security company my mom works for is short-handed, I have asked him to go to work for them, he has a conceal carry license, military experience, he should be more qualified & make more money then my mom (who's unarmed & in charge of her jobsite) does. Her boss at the company heard about my security experience & asked me if I wanted to get my CLEET & work for them. TSA wouldn't hire him because of his credit, but this place doesn't care about that, shoot they only drug test employees when they hire them.
He's been more like a brother to me then a husband, & we were both living w/mom, sharing a bedroom. I want to be a real adult, & actually move away f/home! Why hasn't he got that??? He says its because he was kicked out when he was 15. Still, he was on his own, I never have been, his deployment was supposed to be my chance to actually be on my own, but like everything else he says he gonna do, he doesn't.
He wouldn't let me give up on my dream when I was trying to, now there are fewer job openings now then there was when I was fresh out of school. I don't want to go back to school & get a bachelors, even those w/that degree aren't getting jobs. I applied for "my boss" job after he left the hockey team for another hockey team, I was the least qualified candidate (no one has been announced yet as the new person), but the GM wants to help me gain more experience, so I'll be back with them next season, not getting paid. I need a paying job that I'm qualified for (very few out there), won't interfere w/the hockey team (games played on some Tues. nights, weekends, & some holidays, when newbies at most jobs would have to work), & that my body can handle (bad leg aggravated by cold temps).
I just wish things would get better already, instead of worse & worse (like they have these last 4 years)!
